Keeping Her Distance
by je-taime618
Summary: Amanda Rollins has had a crush on a certain brunette ever since she arrived from Atlanta. She's nervous about telling her, though she wants to so much. She has a plan and puts it into action one night after a successful close to a case. Songfic. Set in the beginning/middle Season 14. Rolivia (Femslash). Don't like, don't read. (Note: first fanfic. Also, I suck at summaries. R&R!


**A.N.: This is my first fanfic. Like, ever. Go easy please. Also, this is femslash. So, if you are against a relationship between two female characters in any way, click that back arrow and get the hell out instead of leaving idiotic comments/reviews. To all others, enjoy :) **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Law and Order: SVU or any of its characters. Also, I do not own the song "Distance" by Christina Perri.**

Keeping Her Distance

While everyone was at the table still, Amanda and Fin discretely walk over to meet Casey and Alex at the bar counter and to the owner and to tell him that it's time. He grabs Alex's piano keyboard and Casey's guitar that were both stored behind the bar counter and hands them both to the gorgeous ladies in front of the counter.

He leans over to Amanda. "You'll do great up there." he whispers to Amanda and gives her a reassuring pat on the back. With a microphone already set up on stage, she was ready. Well, not emotionally though. Amanda was very nervous despite all of her preparation. She asked Fin to help her tonight with this. He immediately agreed to do so and then, with Amanda's permission, also asked Casey and Alex for help with this mission. Fin had picked up on his partner's feelings for the brunette detective in question early on in their time as partners.

The squad had decided to go out to celebrate their recent successful close in a case. It had been a very trying case, which gave them all an excuse to go out for a drink.

Meanwhile, Olivia is still sitting at the table with Cragen, who ordered a club soda, and Amaro, who had a beer in his hand. She starts to become curious when she sees Amanda talking to some guy that looked like the bar owner. Then she spots Alex and Casey near her as well as Fin. It didn't really look like she was getting a round of drinks for their table.

"Hey Don, what's Amanda doing up there talking to that guy?" Olivia asked him, without taking her eyes off of the young blonde.

Cragen shrugged his shoulders as he replied "I don't know, Liv."

As she was about to go see what Amanda was up to, her thoughts were interrupted by someone speaking into the microphone.

"Hey ya'll! How are you guys tonight?!" The bar owner asked the crowd cheerfully. The many patrons of the Friday night crowd cheered on. "Now, I don't usually do this. But I'm gonna have someone up here to perform a song. Here she is, Amanda! Her band also, with Fin on drums, Casey on guitar, and Alex and on piano! Let's give them a welcoming hand!"

The crowd gave a round of encouraging applause. As she climbed up onto the stage, Amanda finally started to feel the butterflies in her stomach fluttering. She glanced over to her left, spotted Olivia in the crowd, and gave her a small smile. All was quiet in the audience now. Amanda walked over to the microphone. Behind her, Fin was set up on stage at the drum set while Casey was getting her guitar ready and Alex her keyboard. She glanced behind her to Fin, who gave her a smile that ensured her further that she'll be fine as well as to her right to Alex and Casey, who did the same.

She didn't announce the song as she stood in front of the microphone, waiting for everyone to settle and took a deep breath before she glanced over at Casey, cuing her to begin strumming up the melody of a song they knew very well. Soon, Amanda took another deep breath and began to sing the verse of a song she had been playing over and over again, having it on repeat on her iPhone.

"The sun is filling up the room,

and I can hear you dreaming.

Do you feel the way I do?

Right now.

I wish we would just give up,

'cause the best part is falling.

Call it anything but love.

And I will make sure

to keep my distance.

Say 'I love you' when you're not listening.

And how long can we keep this up, up, up?"

The strumming of Casey's guitar continued and a few moments later Fin started to add the drum set mix to the song. And when Amanda kept thinking about this song, she couldn't even begin to describe how the next verse applied to her life so much.

"Please don't stand so close to me;

I'm having trouble breathing.

I'm afraid of what you'll see

right now.

I give you everything I am,

all my broken heartbeats,

until I know you'll understand.

And I will make sure

to keep my distance.

Say 'I love you' when you're not listening

And how long can we keep this up, up, up?"

Her voice remaining strong and in tune, Amanda continued to sing her heart out to the brunette.

The message was crystal clear to Olivia now: that Amanda loved – no loves—her. She had always felt some feeling for the younger blonde detective. She never understood what that inkling feeling was until now.

"And I keep waitin'

for you to take me.

You keep waitin'

to save what we have.

So I'll make sure to keep my distance.

Say 'I love you' when you're not listenin'.

And how long can we keep this

up, up, up?

All of a sudden, a blast of power in Amanda's voice erupted within her, causing confidence and pride to be felt throughout the room. With Fin and Casey backing her up, Alex also with the emphasis in every word with the accenting piano playing on her words, them all knowing Amanda's feelings for brunette; this showed just how sure her feelings for Olivia are.

"Make sure to keep my distance!

Say 'I love you' when you're not listenin'

How long 'till we call this love, love, love?"

Amanda looked down at the ground to her right somewhat shyly as she was catching her breath. Fin backed off the drum set, leaving the last few moments of the song with only Alex's guitar strumming remaining, which faded out eventually.

As the song faded out, everyone in the bar began applauding her. It soon turned into a standing ovation and Amanda gave a small bow and a little smile to the audience.

However, Amanda only cared about one person's opinion on her performance. A certain brunette's that is.

Amanda was walking back to her table when her partner caught up with her halfway there.

"Hey, that was amazing." Fin said smiling "I'm sure she loved it. If that didn't win her over, I don't know what would."

"Thanks, and thanks for helping me with this. It means a lot." Amanda whispered with a small shy smile.

"That's what partners do, have each other's six." He said. "Now go off and get that detective that you keep talking about with me."

Amanda smiled at his last comment and walked away. As she was searching for Olivia, she noticed out of the corner of her eye that the brunette was still sitting at the table by herself. Amanda goes over and taps her shoulder. Olivia turns around to see the one person that she confirmed her feelings for tonight.

Olivia made the first move "Hey 'Manda," she began "I never knew that you could sing. You were great. And your voice is beautiful." Olivia said with remnants of being in an appalled state.

"Thank you." Amanda replied politely. She felt awkward because Olivia was just sitting there drinking her beer. No obvious indications that the song that

Amanda had sung had even registered. It was like she hasn't heard her at all. She had said something about her _singing_, not her feelings about the blonde. That is, if there _are_ any reciprocated feelings.

_I hope she didn't misinterpret the song. Please say that Olivia understands that the song was dedicated to her._

After a few moments of awkward silence, Amanda excused herself to go the bathroom. As she briskly strode across the bar, her eyes began to burn with tears. It was hard to keep it together until she reached the women's' room. Amanda walked right into a stall and once inside, locked the wobbly door behind her. At that moment, she let everything go. Amanda slid with her back up against the dirty tile wall to the floor. The tears started rolling down her face as she began to sob. _You idiot, what were you thinking! How could she ever be in love with you of all people in New York City, of the state, of the entire world?_

Suddenly, she heard the door to the women's' restroom swing open and then shut. Amanda heard the click of heels on the tile floor. Curiosity soon got the best of her and Amanda peeked under the small space beneath the stall door. Amanda saw the familiar high heeled boots worn by none other than Olivia Benson. Olivia must have thought that she was alone because all of a sudden she began talking to herself and pacing around in front of the sinks.

"God, how much of an idiot am I? She is probably wondering how the hell I didn't get the message. She must think I'm stupid. No, better yet — she probably thought that I rejected her, as if she didn't even matter. Why didn't I just ask her out? I mean, that song was for me, right? Amanda was looking _right fricken' at me_. I love her, I've loved her since the moment I met her." Amanda felt her breath hitch for a moment. It was at that moment that Amanda decided that she had heard enough. That she did not feel sad or angry or confused any longer. Instead, she lifted up her head from its original position of lying in her hands with her knees curled up to her chest. At Olivia's last comment, the younger blonde's eyes began to light up with life inside them once again. There was a feeling that Amanda had not felt for a while during her time here in New York; it was a warm fuzzy feeling. The feeling of having reciprocated love to you.

The younger woman had calmly but quickly pulled herself up from the grimy restroom floor. Amanda looked down at her clothing to make sure nothing had gotten dirty before opening the stall door. At the sudden noise, Olivia glanced left and stood shocked by the presence of the blonde detective. Amanda was the first to speak.

"I heard everything, Olivia. If you couldn't figure it out yet, Sherlock, I like you. A lot." Amanda said with assurance and a small smile.

"Amanda, ever since you, that sweet Southern girl, walked up to me that one day, I have always loved you. I wouldn't know a day since then that I haven't thought about you." Amanda walked over to Olivia, who had remained standing by in front of the sinks. Amanda was now toe to toe with the other detective, invading her personal space. Their faces were mere centimeters apart.

Amanda had brought her hand up to Olivia's face to gently tuck a loose strand of her soft brown hair behind the older woman's ear. The blonde haired detective had decided to cup Olivia's face in her gentle hands.

They remained like that for a moment before Amanda made the first move and leaned in to softly brush her lips to Olivia's. Originally, the blonde detective had thought that it would be a short, chaste kiss. She had assumed wrong, realizing this when Olivia began to participate and return her kiss but with more passion. Amanda pushed Olivia up against the edge of the sinks' countertop. Olivia moaned pleasingly as she felt Amanda begin to take over, invading all of her senses. Both of them pulled back for a second before things could go much farther. They stared into each other's eyes — vibrant blue eyes meeting equally so brown ones.

It was finally Amanda who had spoken up. "If you wanna continue this right now, might we move to a … more private location?" The brunette nodded in agreement, moving away from the countertop. Both detectives knew that anyone could walk in on them at any given moment. Amanda grabbed Olivia's hand, leading them out of the restroom. When they got closer to their coworkers, they briefly released their grip on each other. Amanda followed Olivia across the crowded bar. They finally reached a door which led put into the alley. Both of them walked into the corridor. The walls on either side were formed with red, rusty brick. Amanda breathed in the crisp night's air, despite the noises and pollutants that is the city scene. It all seemed somewhat serene.

However, as soon as the door slammed shut, everything was back. Amanda found herself pushed up against the closest wall as brunette began the assault on her mouth. The blonde smiled into the kiss. Amanda kissed her back with equal fervor, if not more. She moaned into the kiss with pleasure as she probed at Olivia's mouth with her tongue, silently asking for entrance. Olivia battled with her for dominance, fighting a losing battle as the brunette finally surrendered. Amanda smiled into the kiss again at the satisfaction of having control of it. The blonde detective then pushed off from the wall a bit to switch up their positions, now with Olivia against the alley wall. Amanda slipped her tongue into the veteran detective's mouth. As Amanda began to explore the brunette's mouth with her tongue, Olivia's hands had crept their way into Amanda's lovely blonde hair. Her hands had tangled themselves into the younger detective's hair, pulling her closer, attaining as much contact as possible with the Amanda. The blonde's hands had rested on Olivia's hips and trailed around her waist. They made out for a few minutes like that until the need for oxygen overwhelmed them. They leaned their foreheads together, slowly but surely regaining their breath.

"By the way Amanda," Olivia began, breaking the contact of their foreheads so that she could gaze into Amanda's blue eyes, which were now intensely dark with pure love and lust, "you never have to keep your distance from me. Not now or anymore."

A.N.: Review please :) Also, I was thinking about a sequel to this if you guys want. Let me know in the reviews.


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